Vida Hermosa

A very random blog

I’m lost

I can’t stop crying. I don’t know what to do. Part of me finds staying here useless and the other part of me is too afraid of leaving everyone else behind. I’m not afraid of leaving. I just don’t want my bestfriend to spiral back into drugs because I offed myself. I’m so fucking sad all the time. I’ literally feel purposeless compared to all my friends in college going off and making lives. I can’t do that. My chronic pain doesn’t give me that luxury. I can’t take this

Struggling to eat. I know I’m hungry but the idea of actually eating something sickens me. I can’t physically do it. I’ve been body bashing so much lately. Food just seems like the enemy no matter how hungry I am

disneybroughtmehope:

1 Corinthians 13:4-7   ” 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ”

Disney has always shown a beautiful and magical portrayal of love. Yes, this is a Bible verse and though not everyone believes the way I do, are these things not true? I just love how Disney shows these characteristics in all of their movies.

(via disneytasthic)

A drop into hell

Excruciating panic attack today followed by extreme suicidal thoughts. I somehow gained the will to put the bottles of pills back. I was staring right at death. I said no. I know that’s huge. But afterwards I just sat on my couch shaking for two hours not moving an inch, afraid to get up. I feel like I’m walking on a tightrope…